About 6 weeks ago my IT band went useless. I have found ways to manage the pain, to walk again, to bike, to keep up the CoonDogg Boot Camp conditioning, to do everything but run much. This marathon brought to you by KT Tape and naproxen sodium.
About two weeks ago there was a little bike mishap where I wound up on my butt and, again, a little sore.
Can I run? Yes. Should I run? I have not yet gone medical establishment, paying money and taking time I don't have to hear things I don't want to...
I accomplished what I wanted to do for Samaritans and for Shaira and those who miss her. I have been blessed by support from all corners - more than 100 donors, and roughly $7,000 later, I am humbled. Proud to champion Samaritans, grateful for everyone who helped the non-profit and also helped me get closer to the finish line at Copley. Wishing with every step, every conversation that I wasn't doing this for the reason I am.
Even after I became fairly certain I am not going to run across that finish line, and in fact will probably be dropping off the course well short of that goal the support kept coming. I have the best sponsors on the planet.
As I wrote recently to a small group who asked to sponsor me, "So if me finishing this marathon is important to your donation decision, wait till next year because I'm definitely going to give it another go. If joining in support of Samaritans in memory of Shaira Ali and to help spread the word about an important resource for teens and families (both as clients and as volunteers!) Then I am happy to have your support!"
They donated. In my thank you, overwhelmed with gratitude for what members of my community will do for one another, I wrote:
Thanks, guys! I have been blown away by the community I live in. Completely humbled by how much everyone has been not just willing but eager to support this effort.I consider the support only partially for me but mostly for our kids - Shaira, obviously, and her family, but for everyone. The town I live in really gets it that we are connected, that there is a common good and that we each can grab an oar and share responsibility for each other's well-being. Big thoughts, but I've been having these conversations for several months now and I am just so grateful!The marathon is a selfish undertaking- takes time away from my family, but I personally get a lot out of it even without making the finish line. To combine my selfish pursuit of running long and getting away with eating like a high school football player while with having these conversations about mental health and social supports tending my little corner of our village has been, well, gratifying.
What's going to happen on Monday? I'm going to the starting line, and I'm going to start running. I will probably bawl for the first mile, adrenaline will take me for an hour or so, and I will run as long as nothing hurts. I will walk, run some more, and at some point I will either cross the finish line or stop running before I undo the recovery I've managed, setting my sights on next year. The irony of running so strong for so many years and finding myself injured before the reward that was supposed to be 26 miles of history. Feh. I will walk into the Expo tomorrow like I own it, and wear my spiffy jacket with pride - and gratitude.
So. Thank you. Going for a little run on Monday. See you after.